Christmas Caterpillars and Old Rice

We ride the giant caterpillar home for Christmas, commuting again like we did at the beginning of this blog. It feels familiar, all the ants in transit, yet simultaneously feels so distant and foreign, a language we nearly forgot the words of. The past two weeks have been a windstorm of finals and sales associating, of fingers to keyboards and "Do you need a button-up to go with that cardigan?"  

As we adjust to anything, I have adjusted to retail and the art of starting conversations while meticulously folding clothing. No longer nervous, I genuinely feel like I am helping people to locate the items they are seeking, rather than pushing material goods on people who aren't wanting to spend money. 

Though I'd love to be focusing solely on school, we do what we must, I in my new job, my boyfriend working mornings and nights, and some afternoons, at the cafe next door to us. We pass through the days, pay rent and utilities, and pinch until paychecks. Our meals consist of the remainders of our rice and salad dressing, as we haven't had the time or cash to go food shopping in a little while. It's always interesting, the concoctions made from the last of the food. 

And now we sit on the train, me writing, him reading, as we head home to see our families for Christmas. It's appropriately snowing and freezing, as though the atmosphere has picked up on the Christmas mood that we've been forgetting up in Bushwick. A busy day at work feels like a busy day at work, little more, as I frequently forget that it is the holiday season and Christmas is in fact rapidly approaching. But here it is, in just a few hours. It's quite bizarre.

A Thought: Holidays are funny. They're like days of permission to not work and expectation to see your family. Of course there are other implied meanings, but when you look at them very basically, they are a sort of funny phenomenon. 

A Find:  Streets of Laredo. An amazing band made up of three awesome New Zealanders, two of which work at the cafe next door. They just released the video for their song "Girlfriend," and both the song and the video are awesome!! Totally check it out! http://vimeo.com/46340913

Folding the Words in my Head to Weave Garments

Hours correspond with dollar signs and letter grades. I work, I study. I work, I study. Yesterday at work, a neighborhood cat wondered in through the open door. All folding ceased as we stopped to pet and coo "Fatso." It was a welcome interruption to the general flow of a day in retail. My second week on the job and I feel confident in my folding skills, semi-confident in my sales abilities, and happy with my position. 

After work, on the way to class, I was serenaded to "Call Me Maybe" by an Indian man selling prepaid cell phones, one of the more hilarious things I've seen this month. During class, I received an email from a poetry publication that said they would publish a poetry review that I wrote. SOOO EXCITED!!! My first publication and I'm on my way to eventually getting my own writing published. This will be the first publication for the resume, the beginnings of a literary journey.

It makes me think a lot, about writing, about opportunities, about my own abilities. I wonder about future publications, future means of income, future plans and I over think. I think myself into a whirlwind of possibilities, what ifs, and questions. Will I publish my own poetry? Is that profitable? Would it be better to focus my attentions to other formats, more profitable formats? Should I start my first novel? Should I continue pursuing the crafts I've begun? Crocheting scarfs and leg warmers, crafting jewelry? Who knows? All I can do is continue moving forward, in some direction, at some sort of pace, and I trust something will fall into place.

A Thought: Work and play are mere distinctions established by our minds. If we can bend the boundaries between the two, then each will begin to lend to the other. Our work will be playful, our play will be productive.

A Find: Meeting a new friend, I have been reintroduced to Shamanism. It's an amazing, healing, beautiful art and practice that, I've found, really helps to recenter and calm an individual. Medicinal healings, animal spirits, meditations, breathing exercises, and general reintegration with the earth are all common factors that I've come to find are extremely grounding.